Do you ever get the same feeling as me that you’re constantly running behind? Like you have a long to do list, you complete 90% of it and yet you still have a niggling feeling like you should have pushed that extra bit to get everything done. Sometimes you do have the energy to finish everything off or but some lucky stroke things take less time than you imagined. On those days the sense of achievement is pretty great, but it leaves me asking a question, why do some of us put so much pressure on ourselves?
I don’t actually know where this drive to be busy came from. If I’m honest at times I was a bit of a sloth. I was happy idling my time away, spending time binge watching Game of Thrones and expecting nothing more from my free time than just relaxing and seeing the boyfriends I had at the time.
I’ve noticed most of my female friends and a lot of the blogging community seem to be reluctant to give themselves a break. I don’t know if its crept up on me as I’ve got a bit more mature or whether its actually finding a job that I’m pretty good at and a pretty cool niche in blogging that I really enjoy. I’ve found myself in breaks at work keeping on top of blog emails and wedding research. If I stop my brain feels like its literally breathing a sigh of relief. Perhaps that’s why spa days are so immensely popular?
I am surrounded by so many wonderful people in my life stuck in the same predicament, some tired mothers who accomplish so much; some people managing multiple jobs and people running their own businesses who seem to achieve so much. Everyone seems to have the same worry that they’re not productive enough , not doing enough.
I think I mentioned nearly 2 years ago about having to take a hiatus from blogging and I had to pull back from work as I pretty much worked myself into the ground during a stressful time at work. The day in A&E that followed was at best hilarious as it was so surreal and at worst a warning sign about overdoing it.
So, to all the worriers, the list makers and the people who upon completing their to do list add another 5 things to it. You’re doing a pretty great job, keep it up. The world needs more people who care. But don’t be afraid to sit down and have a tea break, the world won’t stop if you don’t finish everything.
Plus, you can maybe cross a couple of the more unattainable tasks off the list and get some sleep?
“Self care” always seems a very millennial term to me. My mum often ends phone calls telling me to “look after yourself” and I think for me this isn’t about living extravagantly or being greedy with food or possessions. It’s more being kind to yourself, taking care of yourself even when things feel bleak and not going to extremes to make yourself feel better.
Caring for oneself might not be flashy, it might not give you the best social media following or Instagrammable moments 24/7 but it can keep you going when things get tough or when you’re feeling burnt out.
Here are some things that always help me when life starts getting on top of me (for whatever reason):
1. Have a bath. If you’re like me and your wonderful family and friends buy you a lot of bath stuff for Christmas or birthdays keep a stash to feel like a treat. There’s nothing like using something lovely smelling to lift your mood.
2. Soul food. There’s nothing like cooking the sort of thing you used to be fed when you were growing up to make you feel a bit better. If you’re really struggling with life even a bowl of kids cereal is fortified with vitamins and minerals and soup is cheap and filling (souper).
3. Take one thing off your list. In my job I write lists to help me to remember what I have to do and I encourage the people of my team to keep lists. I advise you, if you’re feeling truly overwhelmed with everything you expect to get done be realistic. Are you really going to have time for everything? You don’t have to be superwoman. Take something of your list to ease the pressure if it’s not an urgent task.
4. Sort out your socks. This is a silly one but tidying and cleaning helps you feel in control (this from a messy person!) and I realized just this weekend but actually wearing matching socks helps with the overall feeling of taking some pride in your appearance.
5. Spend time with loved ones. When life gets hard it is so easy to withdraw but I promise you company will help. Even if you’re sitting drinking tea at your friends house or playing games with your siblings. Don’t doubt the magic of spending time with people where you can just be yourself.
6. Get outside. See some nature. Get some fresh air. Blow those cobwebs away. Simple.
7. If you have a pet there is literally nothing nicer than them coming up to you and nuzzling you. I know not everyone is an animal person but if you are you’ll understand exactly what I mean.
Be kind to yourself ladies and gentlemen.